Updated: Mar 20
When I was dating, a question that I had most of the time is “How will I know if he is the right one?” There’s many factors that go into figuring that out and the process of figuring it out can be a long one for some, while others have an intuition or they just know. Most likely, they are very in tune with the Holy Spirit.
It is important to be aware of red flags in dating so that you will be better equipped to choose the right man for you for marriage and to avoid suffering in marriage and the possibility of getting divorced.
Here are three red flags for single women to be aware of when dating:
1. The man you are dating does not keep his word.
Luke 16:10 in the bible states “The person who is trustworthy in very small matters is also trustworthy in great ones; and the person who is dishonest in very small matters is also dishonest in great ones.”
A marriage is one of the biggest promises a person can make. If a man cannot keep his word on smaller promises, then that can be an indication of how he’s going to keep bigger promises.
He might have the other qualities you are looking for, but if he is going to break his promises, you’ll constantly get disappointed. Is that worth it for you?
2. The man you are dating pays more attention to other women than you when he is with you.
If a man talks more with other women and pays more attention to them, while he is dating you, then he is not ready for a faithful commitment. Even if he says he loves you and he’s going to change, actions speak louder than words. If you feel like you are being taken for granted, then you probably are.
3. The man you are dating gets easily angered.
A person who gets easily angered may later not be able to show self-control and resort to verbal abuse and physical abuse. The issue of anger may show up as minor irritations, but you may be able to spot this issue when you are constantly arguing with each other.
Research conducted by the U.S. National Library of Medicine National Institute of Health in 2013, found that the common contributors to divorce were
lack of commitment,
conflict / arguing
They report that “final straw” reasons for divorce were infidelity, domestic violence, and substance use.
The most commonly reported major contributors to divorce were lack of commitment, infidelity, and conflict/arguing. The most common “final straw” reasons were infidelity, domestic violence, and substance use.
An article by the Institute of Family Studies written by Scott Stanley reviews several research findings. Most of the research articles reviewed cited infidelity as one of the top three reasons for divorce. Conflict and arguing or verbal, physical and emotional abuse were listed is one of the top three reasons for most of the research that was cited in the article.
When you are dating, be in tune with whether the man you are dating keeps his word, you trust that the man will be faithful from his actions, and his demeanor when he gets disappointed and you mention that you disagree with him.